An expression that should never be said to a cancer patient: it may worsen his diagnosis – La Linterna
At 67, Pilar has survived two breast cancers and suffered from chronic metastases for eight years. Since then, he has been living with a disease that cannot be cured because there is no effective treatment.
“When someone is diagnosed like this, the consequences are huge: you are also diagnosed with metastases, and everything becomes even more serious. Moreover, it is associated with death,” explained Pilar.
This is not trivial, since one in eight women will suffer from breast cancer throughout their lifetime. Although the survival rate exceeds 80%30% of patients develop metastases over time. Innovation has advanced and new medications have emerged that improve quality of life, but they are not available to everyone.
“They know what’s going on, but they don’t know what, mom is suffering and dad is crying, we think the children won’t know anything,” he said. Pilar Fernandez is president of the Spanish Association of Metastatic Breast Cancer and knows well how this disease affects both to the person who suffers from it and to his family. There is a process of acceptance and assumption that they cannot be cured.
Like every Tuesday we talk Flashlight mental health with neuropsychologist Aurora García Moreno. She herself told us how emotionally difficult it is for patients to face the diagnosis.
“This has a profound impact not only on patients, but also on family and primary caregivers. They suffer emotional changes that can lead to psychological problems and become more vulnerable. They limit emotional stability, such as fear, because the brain acts as if it is in danger and sends signals to protect us,” he said.
What you should never say to someone with cancer
Fear, episodes of anxiety, and a “feeling of helplessness” when treatment fails are some of the consequences that cancer patients may suffer, especially those who have metastatic disease and whose disease has become chronic. It also doesn’t help that the disease is associated with death and “not moving forward.”
And yes, as the doctor explained, there are many stereotypes around cancer that only undermine mental health. from patients. “The patient may be stigmatized and receive messages that cancer is an experience to learn from, to laugh at, to be strong, and we see this reflected in the warrior metaphor,” he explained.
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For this reason, he says that we should never, even with the best intentions, tell people with cancer that they are facing a battle, a war, or that they are fighters. “In counseling they tell you they’ve learned it, but in many cases they don’t identify with it, don’t find the learning and don’t go through the real challenge,” he said.
Mental health essentials for cancer patients
Of course, mental health is key in this type of patient. Because his illness already represents a deterioration in physical health, and even more so in emotional health. That’s why, The doctor recommends strengthening these elements and help and accompany them.
“There are studies that after this diagnosis say that stress is associated with the progression of cancer, prevents emotional stability and other processes. Hence the possible connection It is critical to learn management strategies,” said Dr. García Moreno.
“This impacts disease progression and emotional well-being, allowing us to make very limited treatment choices, in addition to the uncertainty caused by not knowing what will happen, which creates anxiety and stress for patients and their families. “Most of these people have no choice but to adapt to this process by learning to live with this disease,” he said.