Demi Lovato: the singer would like us to respect her choice of personal pronouns

“Today is a day when I am so happy to share even more of my life with you all – I am proud to let you know that I identify as non-binary.” So spoke the singer Demi Lovato last year, the space of a non-binary coming-out particularly noticed on social networks.

As a reminder, non-binarity is the fact of refusing to be categorized as “man” or “woman” within society and by extension breaking with the binarity of genders that we are assigned to the birth. This very often involves challenging the sexist stereotypes associated with it. This is what Demi Lovato also claims.

However, during an exchange given to a podcast at the beginning of August, Demi Lovato told us that she now wanted to be assigned the gender pronoun “elle” (“she / her”) and not the pronoun “iel” (“they/them”) traditionally attributed to non-binary people. And too bad if it seems to disturb some.

A personal but controversial claim

Specifying these gender pronouns has become an act as intimate as it is political in a society marked by non-binarity and gender fluidity. On Instagram and Twitter, being specific really matters. This makes it possible to make visible and support marginalized queer people (such as non-binary people, too misunderstood, mocked), to attribute to the question of gender identity a palpable importance.

We therefore understand why Demi Lovato takes the trouble to inform us of these personal changes. She elaborates within the podcast: “I am a fluid person when it comes to my gender, my sexuality, my music, my creativity. Last year, my energy oscillated between my male and female energy. But recently, I feel more feminine and so I again adopted the gender pronouns that go with it”.

It’s crystal clear. For Demi Lovato, understanding and accepting the meaning of these details, “it’s just a matter of respect”. This did not prevent, as Stylist deplores, a flood of negative reactions emerging on social networks following this declaration. And this while, the magazine rightly specifies, “Lovato’s decision to use both the pronouns she and iel does not make her any less non-binary for all that”.

A fake controversy? We could affirm it with vigor, especially at a time when, across the Atlantic in particular, many personalities specify “she/her” in their bios. This is for example the case of the democratic senator and former presidential candidate Elizabeth Warren…

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