Patricia Gutierrez, clinical psychologist: “Values ​​are the basis for the well-being, internal security and emotional stability of children” | Family | Moms and dads

With more than 25 years of experience in the field of social and health interventions, as well as emotional support for both families and minors, Barcelona-born Patricia Gutiérrez Albaladejo (Granollers, 43) knows how important values ​​are as the main source of protection for people. . . Knowledge that prompted this clinical psychologist to create two years ago an ambitious project called Familiando, which aims, in particular, to identify and build value systems such as…

With more than 25 years of experience in the field of social and health interventions, as well as emotional support for both families and minors, Barcelona-born Patricia Gutiérrez Albaladejo (Granollers, 43) knows how important values ​​are as the main source of protection for people. . . Knowledge that led this clinical psychologist to create two years ago an ambitious project called Familiando, whose goal is precisely to identify and build value systems such as empathy, education or generosity.

But this project requires tools to implement it. That is why she is also a professor at the Autonomous University of Madrid and founder of the TAP Center. Advanced Psychology Treatment spent two years writing the book. Discover (your) values. A practical guide to training and protection (“Octahedron”, 2023). This is a practical picture book that, according to its author, is “a call for prevention, well-being, identity building and homeland security for adults and children.”

ASK. What are values?

REPLY. Values ​​are the principles or qualities that characterize and define us as people and therefore guide our present and future actions. They are the guide and means to achieve everything we offer. They arise from reflection, meditation and listening, from the internal dialogue we acquire throughout our development, and from the process of maturity that we, as humans, experience at different stages and in different life cycles. Values ​​organize our world in a safe and stable way, they play a fundamental role in stabilizing our world, in constructing our roles, and even in the evaluation we give ourselves (self-esteem).

TO. Why is it important to cultivate values?

R. As mothers and fathers, we are always thinking about how to protect, how to accompany our sons and daughters in their growth, how to provide them with resources so that they can cope with the demands that they will face… Values ​​are a great resource, cornerstone of protecting our children. This is the basis of well-being, internal security and emotional stability. They are an integral part of the belief system and how it will shape our children’s behavior and decision making in their daily lives. They will be present in all their life stages and growing up processes, will help them, in turn, express interests, desires and needs, being the driving force in the development and management of their emotions. So central to the well-being and mental health of minors, learning to identify, choose and build a value system that will define them as people is critical to ensuring their care and protection.

question. How is a person educated in values?

R. Parenting with values ​​is relatively simple. Perhaps the most important thing is to know the values ​​that define us as emotional guides. All people, all fathers and mothers, have values, even if we have not identified them and made conscious choices about them. First of all, it is necessary to determine your individual value system in order to then form a conscious choice of a family value system; We cannot forget that we are active role models for our sons and daughters. In this way, we can accompany our children in their development in a simple way.

TO. Are all values ​​equally important when it comes to education?

R. All values ​​are equally valid. Each of them helps us define ourselves as people. This is one of its keys, because we have the ability to choose how we want to be, and knowing that everyone is protectionist, it is important to consciously exercise these choices in order to provide protection and predictable support for our children. Children and adults need predictability in the context of our development; and it is values ​​that give us this ability to predict.

TO. Are they acquired or are you born with them?

R. Values ​​are inherent in the human condition because from the moment we are born we are immersed in a particular society. At the same time, societies are directly influenced by culture, which, although sometimes we families do not express it explicitly, is always ingrained in us and therefore we pass on values ​​from generation to generation. Across cultures, we share codes, symbols, norms, traditions, artistic expressions, beliefs, values… The way we express, develop and teach our children will define their individual and collective culture. Families are immersed in culture, and this shapes the individual and shared value systems of our children. On the other hand, we know that values ​​are constantly being formed, so we can modify and model them, no matter what culture we belong to.

TO. Is it possible to choose the values ​​in which to raise your children?

R. Of course, we have the opportunity to make the first choice of values ​​that will define us as a family. In fact, this is part of our responsibility. We must provide them with safety, stability, boundaries and protection so that they grow up healthy, stable and protected, so we must first determine which system will be most protective for them. As minors grow and acquire the maturity to participate in their personal determination, it is important to invite them to actively participate in choosing their own individual value system. But also an intra-family value system that promotes their active participation, which will lead to their self-care, their self-esteem, their internal security and sense of belonging, connection with the rest of the family.

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