Vogue Etiquette: Bella Thorne and Plum Sykes on the dos and don’ts of a bachelorette party

Thorne: Drinking games. I’m a big drinker.

An all-white wardrobe for the bride? Yes or no?

Sykes: I think it’s very pretentious and very fairytale and I think she should do it. Your wedding day is one of the few times you can wear a fabulous white dress, and maybe your bachelorette party is one of the few times you can wear an all-white wardrobe all weekend and look like an angel. So why not?

Thorne: Yes and no. I think it would be fun to dress in hot pink and then have all the ladies dress in white.

Can the bride choose coordinating bridal shower outfits?

Sykes: I went to one of Gwyneth Paltrow’s birthday parties. It was like an event and we all got T-shirts that said, “I went to Gwyneth’s birthday party and all I got was this crappy T-shirt.” I like it. If it’s something fun and upbeat and fun and everyone gets the joke, I think it’s totally fine. I don’t think daughters-in-law should be forced to wear the same thing – remember, they should do it on their wedding day.

Thorne: Hooray. Definitely yes. I love the whole community spirit. How nice. And I love to compete with my friends.

Should the bride bring goodie bags to the party?

Sykes: I think it’s very nice and makes people feel welcome. I was at a party (it wasn’t a hen party) given by Alice Naylor-Leyland and she had a napkin monogrammed for each person individually with their full initials. And we all took it home and thought it was the most wonderful thing to keep. I’m all for a goodie bag – throw in some nice chocolates, a candle and some great Gucci sunglasses if you’re really going all out.

Thorne: Ideally, yes, with the bare necessities for the weekend. If you’re going to a hot place, pack your gift bag with the best sunscreen, body butter, and some really cute flip-flops that have something written on them that hints that you’re getting married and that they’re your best friends.

Etiquette for bachelorette parties

What should a bachelorette party do if she can’t afford to take part in the celebration?

Sykes: I think she should just call a spade a spade and say, “I can’t afford this. Thanks for the invitation. “I love you to death, but I’m not coming.” I really do. If you apologize and decline an invitation for a made-up reason, you will be found out. I just think everyone should be as honest as possible. It’s very difficult to do, but I think it’s much easier than making a bunch of excuses.